When Will My Life Begin
by Nikki Ross
Summary: Carrie Sommers mother,daughter,aunt,and sister. Carrie is the mother of Missy who is sadly wanting a father. She is helping Jenna raise their niece and nephew. Carrie has been closed off from dating since Missy's father. When new history teacher Alaric Saltzman comes in she may need more help then ever plus everyone's favorite raven vampire hitting on Missy. Damon X OC & Ric X OC
1. Take Me Home

I had always been in my sister's shadows no matter what I did. Miranda always had everything sorted out, Jenna was the fun rebellious one who did what she wanted. I , however, was in the middle of the two. I was younger than Miranda and older then Jenna, so I had certain responsibilities. The one thing that a younger sibling never expects is for the older sibling to pass away and that's exactly what happened. I walked down the steps and into the kitchen after checking on my daughter. Jenna was in there scrambling to get thing together. I walked through the door of the kitchen and over to the coffee machine.

" Jen, I have to head out to work. You got this?" I asked my younger sister.

" Yes, Carrie. Their three teens, I'll be fine," she said confidently. I gave her a smile as I poured my coffee. She hugged me and I went to get in my car. Elena and Jeremy came down stairs before I left. Missy was behind them slowly walking down the steps. She got down to the bottom and I stopped her.

" Mis, I love you. You know that right?" She nodded and I smiled, " I'll see you later."

" Love you too Momma," she said hugging me. I huggd her back when I let go I smiled. I walked out the door and went to my car. When the car stopped I was at the school. I got out and went inside. When I got inside I went to my class room. I got my stuff set up on my desk when Tanner came in my room. He annoyed me everyday before school started. I've told him I'm and time again that the answer was no and always will be no.

" It's seems that you just keep getting later and later," he said.

" Tanner, don't you have someone else to annoy?"

He chuckled as he walked I to my room, " so did you know we're getting a knew student?"

" No. Oh, leave my daughter alone and I have a question for you. Why do you annoy me out of all the teachers?"

He didn't answer me though, he just chuckled and walked out of my room. The periods past and fourth period came faster than anticipated. The roomed piled up with teens, most with familair faces, one was my daughter the other being unfimiliar though. I guessed he was the new kid Tanner mentioned.

" Salvatore, right?" I asked him sticking out my hand.

" Yeah, Stefan , I'm a distant relative of the founders," he grabbed my hand and shook it.

I laughed, " Tanner, already asked didn't he?"

" Yeah," he said nervously.

" Ok then, well, I'm Ms. Sommers," she grabbed a book and a packet," here is your copy of Pride and Prejudice, and here are the notes to help you catch up. You can sit next to Missy."

He laughed and went to take his seat. I saw Missy roll her eyes and smiled. I started teaching my lesson for a fourth time that day. I must say I was happy Tanner didn't bother me during lunch though. I don't know why out of everyone he bothers me. Missy is being to think something is going on between us, but she knew I had higher standards then him. The final bell rang and I waited twenty minutes before I went home, Jenna was already in the kitchen when I got there. Jeremy was out with some of his friend and Elena was in her room doing homework. I crept up behind my sister and pushed two fingers into both her sides. Jen jumped and turned to face me.

" Carrie!?" She yelled her voice full of questions.

" oh, come on Jen, don't do the voice that got Mir and I in trouble."

" It wouldn't have got you trouble if you two didn't sneek up on me," she said playfully.

" Okay, so Jenna how'd thing go today?"

" Harder then I thought ,but fine," she said nodding as I walked over to the fridge. I opened it and grabbed a can of soda out of it.

" Was Missy good?"

" She was fine. I just think she wants a father figure instead of another girl," Jen stated.

" She knows I'm not looking for anyone."

" Doesn't mean she can't want one," she was trying to get me to see reason.

I turned around to here the door openeing. Elena was talking to someone, but I couldn't make the other voice out. She came through the kitchen door and told us.

" I'm going to the Grill."

" Oh, I got this don't stay out to late it's a school night," she said smiling.

" Well done," Elena said nodding. She shut the door behide her.

" Nice, Jen, though next time say it with confidence."

She laughed a pushed my shoulders. I laughed with her and went up to my room. The door shut behind me and I set my stuff down on my bed, with the can being set on my nightstand. I heard a knock on my door and went to answer it.

" Missy, everything okay?"

" Yeah Momma, I just wanted to ask if you , um.. if you were okay," she said coughing.

" I'm fine honey. You finish your homework?" She nodded, " okay get some sleep Tanner's giving a pop quiz tomorrow."

She laughed and walked out of my room. I sighed, shutstye door, and got out of my clothes so I was only in my lace bra and underwear. I threw my dirty clothes in the hamper and walked over to my dresser to find night clothes to wear. I searched and found my yoga shorts and a black tank top to wear. My blonde, red hair was thrown up in a pony tail and I hopped in bed. I got under the cover and turned the lamp beside me out. I layed there thinking about Jenna had said. _Did Missy really want a father_ figure? _The_ darkness crawled through my room as the tireness of the day lead me to a peaceful sleep that night..


	2. And It Begins

I got up around 5:55 a.m. and got ready for work. I had l be there around 6:30 so I go up early. I walked to Missy's room and her history book laying on her stomach. I smiled and slowly opened the door more. I carefully walked in and pick the book up off her , put a pencil in the book to mark the page, and set it on her stand. I was about to walk out when I turned around and placed a kiss on her head.

I walked out and quietly shut the door behind me. I still couldn't get what Jen said out of my head. Missy was my angel, my baby girl I would do anything to make sure she was okay and happy. It was what mother's do, protect their children. And of course her father was still an ass and I made sure he had nothing to do with her. He never knew I was pregnant, his name wasn't even on her birth certificate. Of course I wanted her to have a father, but I wasn't in a hurry to find anyone.

I walked down to the kitchen and poured myself coffee. I left a note and instructions for Jenna. I got in my car and drove to the school, and for once I was there before Tanner. I got out and slammed my door shut. I walked to the front door and opened it. My heels clicked against the floor as I walked to my room. The door opened and I reach my hand around the side of the to find the switch. I found it and turned the lights on. I walked in and sat down at my desk. Minutes passed and all the teachers had finally showed up. Tanner couldn't bother me today because of how close it was for school to start.

Students started rushing through the doors to get to their classes. I of course had kids taking notes and doing review questions so I went to get something to drink from the vending machine. When I came back to my room the kids were packing up their things and playing on their phones. I looked at my watch and noticed we still had 15 minutes until the next period.

" what do you all think you're doing?" I asked curiously, " we still have 15 minutes."

One girl raised her hand to answer, " we all finished taking notes and we finished doing the questions you assigned."

" Okay then someone tell me what the last two chapters were about or could someone give me a summary of the whole story?" They all stayed quite, " no, okay then get your notes out and study till the bell."

They groaned and got their note books back out. I guessed they figured because tonight was the bon-fire they would get off easy. The periods passed and everything up until lunch was going great.

" Tanner I know you're there."

" Carrie, you know you can call me William," he said enter the classroom.

" I know , but I never said you could call me Carrie. Now did I?"

" Why are you so stubborn?" He said leaning on my desk.

" Because I have I job and three kids to look out for instead of one. Besides I don't date."

" Come on Sommers one drink," he stated clearly.

" Oh, just one. You're lucky we are in a school, but I'll but it nicely it's never going to happen."

He sighed walking out of my room and hopefully out of my personal life. The day ended and I hoped to god that I could get home fast. I pulled into the driveway and parked my car. I got and hurried inside and saw Missy laying on the couch.

" I figured you would be getting ready for the Bon-fire tonight."

" I am not going," Missy stated to her mother.

" and why's that, baby girl?"

" I just don't want to deal with Vicki and Jeremy and Elena and Care. Basically everyone," she said as she rolled over to face me.

" Did they say something?"

" they keep wondering why I don't want a dad. I mean I do , but I don't need one," she said.

" honey , why didn't you tell me? You know you mean the world to me."

" because I don't want you to feel like you have to be with someone to make me happy."

Right when I was about to reply my phone went off. I pulled it out of my purse and answered.

" hello ."

 _" Carrie, something happened."_

" Elena, what happened?"

 _" Vicki Donovan was attack by something."_

 _"_ Attacked? Attacked by what?"

 _" No one knows. Can you come get us?"_

" Okay. Stay there I'm on my way," I hung up and looked at my daughter, " we are finishing this conversation later."

She nodded and I went to the door to go to my car. I drove to the falls and picked up Elena and Jeremy. When they got in the car I drove away from the falls. I looked up into my mirror to look at both of them.

" both of you listen to me. I am not your mother , okay I could never bee Miranda. I never want hear again that either one of you or your friends are talking to Missy about not having a dad again. Got it!"

They nodded and I sighed softly. We got home the car stopped and they ran inside and up to their rooms. I went to get a drink. When I got one I went back to the living room and sat down on the couch. Minutes passed and I went over the stand and pulled out some photo albums. Most of them I took but others my parents took. I sighed and closed them.


	3. Someday

The night calmed Carrie as she sat thinking about what Missy said. The last guy she had been with was a man she thought she could trust. A man she thought she loved, but she was wrong. Her being wrong gave her Missy, the girl she wanted to give the world to. Miranda always told that being a parent was he best and worst thing that could happen to you. She even remembered the night she told Mir and Grayson she was pregnant.

 _Flashback:_

 _Carrie came through the door of Miranda and Grayson's house. She had recently called Mir and asked if she could talk to her. She wouldn't_ be _there for any other reason. Carrie went to the kitchen and saw Elena doing her homework at the dinning room table. She walked further in and saw Miranda working on dinner._

 _Mir looked up and saw Carrie, " Lena why don't you go finish your homework up stairs."_

 _Elena sighed and grabbed her work and run-up to her room._

 _" hey Mir," Carrie said walking over and giving her sister a hug._

 _" Hey Carrie, you said you wanted to talk," her sister said setting her knife down. Before she could answer Grayson came through the door. He came into the kitchen and saw the girls together._

 _"Carrie?" He said questionably._

 _" Hey Grayson ," she said quietly._

 _' honey she wanted to talk to us about something," Miranda said calmly._

 _" what did you want to talk about?" He asked._

 _" um.. please don't yell at me," Carrie said._

 _" why would we yell?" Mir asked._

 _" Huh, it's actually pretty funny if you think about it," Carrie replied._

 _" Carrie , just tell," Grayson said quickly._

 _" I'm.. I'm pregnant!"_

 _Grayson and Miranda stared at her in shock. Miranda set her bowl down and coughed._

 _" is Lucas the father?" Miranda asked her._

 _" that's why I wanted Grayson here. I was hoping we could leave him out of this."_

 _" did you two break up again?" She asked her sister._

 _" yes, and I'm sick of it."_

 _" well, we can keep him off records," Grayson replied._

 _" thank you," she said._

 **xxxxx Line Break xxxxx**

I turned around and saw Missy standing on the steps.

" Missy, what are you doing up?"

" couldn't sleep," she said walking over and sitting next to me, " plus you said we would finish our conversation."

" okay. Why didn't you tell me?"

" I didn't want you unhappy so I could be happy," she said leaning on my shoulder.

" Trust me when I meet him you'll meet him,"

" I know momma. I just want you to be happy."

" come on , let's get some sleep," I said. We later back on the couch and went to sleep.

. 

**Hours Earlier, Missy POV:**

I walked into school and was walked over to Vicki.

" hey Vic.'

" Hey Mis," she replied with a smile.

' so, how are you and Tyler?"

" um .. we're good. I think," she said, " I don't know anymore. I mean at first we were fine, but now he's bringing ass. Any way aside from problems how have you been?"

" good."

" still no dad I see," she said. After understanding what she said she covered her mouth and said," Mis, I'm so sorry."

" it's fine. Um.. I should get to class."

I walked of and ran into Matt.

" Hey Matt."

" hey Mis, you okay? You look upset," he said to me.

" yeah Matty. I'm just. Do you think it's weird I don't know my dad?"

" no. Why did someone say something?" He asked me.

" yeah. Well, Vicki and I were talking and she just brought it up."

" there's nothing wrong with you. Okay, and I'll talk to Vicki," he said putting a hand on my shoulder.

" I don't want to cause a problem between you two."

" Missy it's fine. Are going to the Bon-fire?"

" Um.. I haven't decided yet. I should get to class."

He nodded and I walked away. I went to my first period which of course was Tanner. I paid attention enough to pass the class. When the bell rang I went to my next period. The day continued like that till lunch. I sat down at a table only to be crowded by Caroline, Bonnie, and Elena.

" Hi Missy. Matt told us what happened between you and Vicki," Elena said.

" Of course he did."

" You know, you can come talk to us if you want to talk about missing a parent," Caroline said after.

I didn't reply I couldn't without snapping, so I just sat there. The bell rang and I went to class, and when the day ended I got home as fast as I could. I got inside and layed on the couch. I only moved when my momma came home. She went to Elena and Jeremy and went up stairs. I heard the door open and figured they got home. Someone knocked on my door.

" It's open," I said.

" Hey Miss," jereny said opening the door.

" Hey Jer."

" I wanted to say sorry for everything that happens and everything that was said," he said walking over and sitting on the edge of my bed.

" It's fine."

" Really?" He asked.

" Yes, really. Now go get some sleep." He nodded and left my room. I layed down on my bed but couldn't sleep after awhile I got up and went down stairs. I saw my momma sitting on the couch closing a photo album. She turned around and saw me. We finished our conversation we started earlier. And we went to sleep on the couch.


	4. arms

I woke up with my daughter's head on my lap. I smiled and pushed Missy on to the ground. Missy hit the floor with a thud she groaned and sat up brushing herself off. She stared at me in disbelief.

" Really? Momma!" She said.

" You were so peaceful. I couldn't stand it."

" You know I wonder who the adult is sometime between us," she said looking back down at the floor. I sighed and pushed the blanket off me. I reached a hand out to her to help her up. She grabbed my hand, but instead of pulling herself up she pulled me on the ground with her. She laughed and used the coffee table to get up. I laughed with her. The day was like everything that we talked about had faded away. Like it was just Missy and Carrie and not Ms. Sommers and Missy.

" Momma, I was planning on hanging out at the grill today. Is that okay?"

" Of course Babygirl just keep your phone on."

" Always do Momma Bear," she happily.

I smiled lightly. She called me that when we were messing around. Missy was the light of my life. I couldn't help to think back to when she said she wanted a dad. I always loved kids though never wanted any. I remember vividly what is was like when Missy was about a month old. She was the cutest thing. Though, if you asked Mir, Elena was cuter. Given I was still in college I babysat a lot of the time. Mostly Caroline , Elena,Jeremy, and Bonnie. Sometimes I'd watch Matt, Tyler, and Vicki.

 _Flashback:_

 _Carrie was walking through the house trying to keep herself busy. Mir had left for work along with Grayson leaving her alone to babysit._

 _She was holding Missy in her arms bouncing her up and down lightly. Singing as she walked. Elena and her friends came running down the steps chasing each other._

 _" Girls no running."_

 _In the kitchen the girls were running from Caroline when she tripped. Caroline hit the ground and started crying which_ _caught Carries attention she sat down Missy and looked towards the kitchen_ _. When the crying continued she ran into the kitchen to see Caroline in tears. She walked over and sat down next to her._

 _" Hey Care- Bear can you tell me what happened."_

 _The little blonde had tears streaming down her cheeks, " I.. I was.. was run.. running and I.. I tri.. tripped."_

 _Carrie lifted Caroline up in her arms and carried her to the living room. Carrie sat down with the blonde in her arms rocking her in her arms. Her small hand reached up and started playing with Carries necklace._

 _" Bear," she stated happily._

 _" Yeah,that is a bear."_

 _She stopped twirling it and laughed saying, " Momma Bear."_

 **xxxx Line Break xxxxx**

 **Missy's POV:**

I walked into the Grill and sat down at one of the tables. I sat there for about ten minutes when a man I never met before sat down. I looked at him shocked at first and then slightly angered.

" Who are you?"

He smirked which fueled the fire, " Damon, Damon Salvatore."

" Am I supposed to know who you are?" I said to him.

" You know this is the part of the conversation where you tell me your name," he said back.

" Oh. Okay, it's never going to happen, so leave."

" Your very stubborn and it's highly attractive," he said happily.

" Why are you sitting here I don't know you?"

"Well, it's not everyday I see a beautiful woman like yourself," he said the same arrogant smirk appearing on his face.

" Ugh. Do you ever shut up?"

" Maybe. If you have dinner with me."

I laughed and his smirk fell, " your like what 25. I'm in high school you do know that's illigle right?"

" It only illigle if you get caught," he stated. It's not like he was wrong.

" You don't even know my name."

" Then tell me it," Damon pressed.

" Fine. Missy, Missy Sommers."

" Well then Missy, I'll meet you here at 7:00 Friday night," he said standing up and leaving. It took me a minute to relieze what happened. Somehow without knowing I got a date for Friday night. Out of nowhere Caroline sat down at table with me.

" What the hell was that? Mis."

" What was what?" I asked her back.

" You know what that tall, dark, handsome man you where just flirting with," she replied back.

" I don't know but I have a date with him on Friday."

" OMG!" She shrieked.


	5. On My Mind

Missy came home after she meet Damon. A gleam appeared in her eyes as she walked up the painted cement steps. For the first time in her life she had date. The thing she loved about it is when she said Missy Sommers he didn't look at her and say " Oh, Elena's cousin." Now all she had to do was figure out how to tell her mother that she had a date. She could lie and say she was going to the football game to see Tyler.

Missy and Tyler had been friend for awhile. How they acted people would think they were together, but it was the exact opposite. They were brother and sister more than anything. The football team even got her a jersey because of how much she was around Ty. She figured Damon would be there given that his brother had recently joined the team. Tyler was pissed, a triple letter, varsity, athlete was upset by a new player.

None of this was important, right now she was on cloud 9. Until she walked through the door and saw Stefan and Elena sitting on the couch.

" Hey," Missy said awkwardly throwing her bag on the floor.

" Missy, thought you were at the Grill?'' Elena asked suspiciously.

" I was at the Grill for two hours Elena.''

Elena glared at her cousin causing Stefan to intervene, " I don't think we've officially met. I'm Stefan," he said sticking his hand out, " Stefan Salvatore."

Missy's eyes widened at the last name, " Are you related to Damon?'' she asked not thinking about she said.

Stefan's smile fell. He furrowed his brows looking at the red haired girl in front of him, " Um.. yeah, he's my older brother. How.. how do you know him?''

Missy thought for a minute. She didn't want to cause problems between them, " Oh, I met him at the Grill. We're.. we're going out on Friday.''

Elena stood up next to Stefan, " I thought you hung out with the team before games. Or are just jumping from guy to guy? Everyone knows something is going on with you and Tyler''

"Me and Tyler are just friends. And you have no right to say anything about my life,'' Missy looked over at Stefan who standing next to Elena silently, "Stefan I think, maybe you should leave," she stated walking closer to her cousin. Stefan nodded and began to walk away. Before he could reach the end of the couch he heard words that he knew would start a fight.

" Oh, please. People just feel sorry for because your dad left before you were born.''

This one statement threw Missy over the edge, " Right. That's why. What did you tell Jer the other day. People are gonna stop giving him free passes because they don't remember your parents passed away. They moved on. Maybe you should try it instead of trying to be everyone's mom maybe you should grow up. Not everything is about you. If you want peoples pity you're going about the right way."

Elena had slight tears streaming down her eyes, " You're such a bitch. They were your Aunt and Uncle. And it's clear you don't care. Guess the apple doesn't fall to far from the tree, Carrie didn't care and neither do you. Does your Mom even know who your dad is?"

" Okay I think.." Stefan was cut off by Carrie.

" What's going on in here?" she asked not caring that Stefan was there.

Elena wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand, " Nothing we were just talking. Right," she asked looking at Missy. Missy held her hands up in surrender.

Carrie laughed, " I know what talking sounds like girls. I have my fair share of fights," Carrie walked closer to the teens crossing her arms over chest, " Stefan why don't you head home, I'm sure you have things to do.''

Stefan's eyes shifted from girl the next. He realized that he did not want to get caught in the middle of them, " Um.. yeah your right, Ms. Sommers, I forgot I had to help Zack and Damon with something today." He said hurriedly as he grabbed his stuff and walked out the door. When He was gone Carrie walked closer to the girls.

" Both of sit down and be quiet until I get back," She demanded. Both of nodded with dispatch as the older women walked sat down on the couch in silence neither one looking at the other afraid to dig themselves a deeper hole then they already had.

When Carrie came back into the room Jeremy followed quickly behind her. He slightly jogged so he would not get in trouble as well. When he got the couch he sat down in between his cousin and sister as their aunt stood in front of them. The heat of her anger matched the red color of her hair. One would think that if you got to close to her when she was angry would be burnt. The heat of her gaze fell on the teens in front of her. The smoke nearly suffocating them the point of not being able to breath, " Now," she started, " I will ask nicely only once. Got got it," again they nodded quickly, Okay. What the hell did I just walk in on," Now one answered at first, " Jeremy, you were here the whole time right?''

" Yeah,'' he answered. Confused on why she called on him.

" What did you hear?'' she asked trying to conceal her anger.

He sighed. Figuring he should tell the truth, " I heard Missy walk in the house after coming home from the Grill. I figured she set her bag down," he guessed the last part, " Elena wondered why she wasn't at the Grill, Missy said she was there for like two hours. Stefan introduced himself, I would assume to stop a fight. Elena basically called Missy a slut after she said she had a date Friday night and that's all I heard before I started listening to music.''

" Okay," she said calmly.

All of their eyes widened, " Okay?" they asked in unison.

" Okay.. Your all grounded until further notice," she added

Jeremy stood up angry and confused on why he was grounded, " Why am I in trouble?''

" For selling out your sister. I know you were raised to stand by family."

He groaned but agreed silently to what she said. They knew that she wouldn't give in without a fight. And a fight with Carrie Sommers was one no one could went up to their rooms after Elena and Missy apologized to each other. And the rest of the day the Gilbert house was silent.

* * *

 **The Salvatore Boarding House:**

Stefan walked through the door after leaving the Gilbert house. He walked into the living room and saw Damon sitting on the couch drinking. Before Stefan could speak Damon did.

" Hello brother," he said setting his drink down on the stand next to him, " Did you have fun with Elena?" he asked sneering.

" Yeah did,'' he said causing his older brother to roll his eyes. Damon went to walk away, but Stefan continued, " Until she started fighting with her cousin,"

" didn't know Elena had a cousin," Damon replied turning around.

Stefan nodded while saying, " What was her name again? Mary, no, Mia, that's not it."

Damon was getting angry now. He knew that his brother was screwing with him, " I know you know, so save us time and just spit it out.''

" Missy that was her name," He said smirking while looking at his brother, " Missy Sommers, my English teachers daughter.''

Damon's eyes narrowed at his brother, " Okay, what's your point? You think I knew that when I asked her out?"

" No," he said lightly, " But I want to know what game your playing."

Damon laughed, " Well you'll just have wait and find out. Now won't you."

Damon left the room leaving Stefan standing in the middle by the couch.


	6. Devil in the Details

**This chapter has minor parts that have abuse in it. If you read this story you kind of need to read this chapter to understand Carrie's personality. So please let me know what you think.**

* * *

Missy sat on her bed trying to finish what was left of her homework when her mom came in her room. I knocked getting my daughters attention, the younger redhead looked up from her work. Her green eyes met her mothers brown ones

" Hey Momma,'' she said setting her pencil down on one of the notebooks laid across her bed.

" Hey," I replied walking into her room, " So what did Jeremy mean when he said you had a date Friday night?''

Missy froze her movements looking at me scared to speak, " Um..?''

I looked at her waiting her for to continue. She bit her lower lip pushing a piece of red hair behind her ear.

" Honey, you know you can tell me,'' I said sitting down on the bed.

She sighed knowing she eventually had to tell me, " When I went to the Grill I was sitting there waiting for Care to show up when he sat down. We started talking and he asked me if I wanted to go out Friday night.''

" What about the game? And Ty?'' I asked confused.

" We're not meeting till 7:00. I was planning on going to the game for a little and then meeting him."

I nodded, " Do I get to know his name?''

" He's name is Damon. He , actually, is um.. related to Stefan.''

I was taken aback by this, " Really. I didn't know Stefan had siblings. Is he younger or.. older?''

" How mad would you be if I said he was about ten years older than me," she said not making eye contact. I widen my eyes

" And is he?'' I asked getting a confused look from her, " Is he ten years older than you?"

She nodded and I looked down at the flooring of her room, " If you don't want me to go I won't.''

I didn't know what to say. I didn't like the fact that my daughter was about to go out with an older guy, but at least one of us was trying. I saw the look of disappointment in her eyes.

'' Alright,'' I said. Her head whipped around to look me as shock filled her brown eyes, " But, I want to meet him before hand.''

" Okay. I see if he can swing by,'' She said happily.

I left the room and I moved over to the side of the door. I leaned against it my heart dropped flashes of my past jolted through me like lightening

 _Flashback:_

 _" Lucas, you need to calm down,'' I told him but it was no use he was already to far gone._

 _' You don't get to tell me what to do!'' he yelled grabbing me by my hair. He pulled causing me to wince in pain, " I gave you everything!''_

 _At the moment though I wasn't worried about me I was worried about my baby. I had just found out and planned on telling Miranda and Jenna. And that is what caused the argument. He never liked me going to see my sisters. While I was lost in thought I didn't hear him continually yelling at me. When I snapped out of it I felt his grip tighten on my hair and before I knew what happened he through me into the glass cabinet in the living room. I could feel the blood running down back and the pieces of glass still caught in my skin. Tears ran down my face as m vision began to blur, I saw Lucas grab his jacket. Apart of me wanted him to stay, wanted him to go back to being the man I fell in love with._

 _That day , though, is when I figured out that love only lead to heart ache. I did not want to go through that again_

 _: End Flashback_

I was snapped back to reality with Jenna calling my name, " Carrie! Carrie!''

" Yes,'' I said quietly. Jenna looked at me worriedly

" Are you okay?'' She asked walking towards me.

" Just.." I started words escaping my mind, " Just don't.. move.''

I stood there for what felt like eternity trying to catch my breath. My heart was pounding in my ears and my hands were shaking.

" Carrie, do you need me to call someone?'' By this time Elena and Jeremy were out of their rooms standing behind her nervously.

" Aunt Carrie, is everything okay?'' Jeremy asked slowly moving closer. Instead of answering I moved closer to the wall. I moved till there was no space left between me and the wall behind me, my knuckles turned white from my grip. Words evaded my mind as it was moving between the past and the present. I didn't know what to say.

" Carrie!'' Elena yelled hoping I would answer. When I didn't answer she turned to Jenna, " Jenna, what do we do?''

Jenna shook her head and turned to her niece and nephew, " I honestly don't know.''

At this point I started to come to, my grip on the wall loosened, and my breath steady, " I'm fine," I said moving away from the wall, " I'm perfectly fine.'' I fixed my outfit and walked away leaving them standing in the hallway. I walked into my room and closed the door behind. I laid down on my bed and looked up at the ceiling. It had been 15 years since I had last seen Lucas, and he still continued to control my life to this day. I heard a knock on my door and looked up because most people just walked in.

" Who is it?'' I asked voice still sore from my heavy breath.

The voice was quiet, " Momma," the voice said, " Are you okay?''

" Come in,'' was all I said in reply to the question. She pushed my door open and her head peered around the wood. She looked around cautiously before walking in. Her foot steps silent as she walked over to the bed. She sat down slowly not wanting to make any sudden movement. Missy looked at me as worried filled her eyes.

" You gave everyone quiet the scare,'' She said not making eye contact with me.

I laughed at the thought of Elena being worried about me, " That's a surprise.''

" Momma when are you going to talk to me about this?'' She asked sadly. The thing was I didn't want to talk to her about this. My sister didn't even know so I'll be damned if I tell my 15 year old daughter about her jackass of a father.

" Never,'' I stated without a second thought. Missy sighed and laid down next to me as I stared up at the ceiling.

" Damon said that he's coming over sometime this week because Elena's having a dinner for Bonnie to get to know Stefan,'' She said changing the subject, " If you still want to meet him.''

" Well, I'm not getting any younger.''


End file.
